Happy Birthday Sweet Boy

To our sweet boy,

Today is your fourth birthday.  We sent you a cake, so prayerfully you will get it around your birthday.  We do not know if you ever celebrated your birthday or understand the fun of being a new age.  We do not even know if someone left a note so you know your true birthday, or if someone chose this day because it was a good guess.  We know that God knows when you were created and when you were born and He celebrated you. 

Although I am happy that you are reaching a new milestone, it makes me so sad that we have missed four years of your life now.  I wish it wasn't that way, but all we can do now is look to the future and plan to always make your birthdays special, as well as each day we are blessed enough to get to spend with you.  

I also think about another mom somewhere in China.  Does she get sad every year around now missing you and wondering how you are doing?  Does she wonder if you are still in China, or if you have been adopted somewhere?  Does she think about the situation around your birth and the six months that she got to spend with you?  I wish that I could at least put some of her worries to rest and let her know that you are going to be part of a family.  Maybe someday we will be able to make this happen with God's help.

Someday we will get to tell you how on your fourth birthday we were already making plans for you and praying for you and we already loved you as a part of our family.  Someday we can tell you that when you turned four, we were finishing up our dossier paperwork and praying that things would go speedily and that we could go and get you in record time.  We can tell you that we thought about you when you turned four in China at midnight, and again around 7 am when we thought you might be waking up, and again when you would be eating lunch and then we celebrated you on the date of your birth in America.  Someday we can talk to you and help you to celebrate the joy of your birthday, as well as help you deal with any sadness of this day that makes you think about all of the questions you have about the parents that you knew the day that you were born.  We know you won't get to celebrate with the family who has been with you since birth like your sisters do and I'm so sorry that you have already had loss and sadness in your little life. 

Know though, sweet boy, that we are celebrating you!  We are thankful to God for you!  We are so grateful that you were brought into this earth four years ago today and we pray that God gives you a peace and a joy today in knowing that you are loved and wanted.  Happy Birthday!!

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.   I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.   Psalm 139:13-14